Trife Life

There are some who say I'm boogee (that's bourgeois, for the proper set).

Those people would be right. I am boogee. Get over it.

I'm more tenderloin than Chuck steak; Merlot over Mad Dog 20/20 (who wouldn't be?) and Fiji water over Deer Park. I like the good stuff. It's just how I am.

Don't get me wrong, I can do boogee on a budget in a heart beat. I love Steve Maddensand Jimmy Choosbut I'll rock a a good fake if necessary.

I'm particular about certain things. But most are personal choices that I can control.

The hardest part about being boogee is living in a world where some people, places and businesses insist on being trife.

You can call me boogee for being annoyed by this. But, honestly, is there any call for:

Dual operating systems for franchises - I'm not talking about some fancy, technological operating system. I mean, literally, why are some franchises insistent upon melding into their so-called "environment" instead of holding up generic customer service and operating processes across locations?

I went to the Hollywood Video in Annapolis, today. Something told me to just hit the one across the street from my house. But that would have required going in late. And you all know how diligent I am about getting to work on time. Heh, heh.

So I decide to hit the one right down the street from my office. For those who don't know, I live in an area considered somewhat hoity-toity, snooty. I work in Annapolis, which is also known for its snobbery. But my office is located in an area that's more around-the-way than hoity.

I show up at the store at 10:05. Doors locked. Hmmm...that's odd.

I check to make sure they open at 10 a.m. like the one where I live.

Yup, 10:00.

Check my cell again for the time.

Clerk walks by the window and waves to me.

WTF?!

I try the doors again. Maybe it's just me, ya' know?

No. They're locked.

The clerk walks by again! So I call the store and he answers.

"Err...are you open or not?"

He wasn't aware the door was locked. Thought I was just waiting on someone.

Okay. I give him a pass.

Then I ask can I give him my phone number because, typical of me, I cleaned out my purse and purged everything. So no HV card.

He ponders this. Hmm....no, don't think we can do that.

Really? They do it at my Hollywood Video all the time.

He checks by my last name. Nope. I'm a non-person at this location. Gotta fill out a new card.

:::sigh:::

I hate Blockbuster. But you just know I'm wishing I had chosen to go there instead. I know their systems are more streamlined.

Us boogee chicks like things that make our lives easy! Cause, you know, it's all about us.

Alright. Look it's hitting on 10:30, I've got to get back to work before someone misses me. So while he's tapping my info into the system for a new card, I go grab up what I came for. A copy of Kong and Capote (mmmmm...eclectic, no?)

So no copies of Capote on the wall. And they only had about...twelve copies to start.

I roll by and head towards Kong. By God there better be a copy or I'm going off in this joint.

As I pass the shelves, I notice there was a FULL wall of 50 Cent's Get Rich or Die Tryin'.

Whatev!

No interest in that. Who doesn't know 50's life story?

Pick up a copy of Vibe, The Source, Rolling Stone, or for that matter, Entertainment Weekly. It'll only cost you $3.99 and five minutes of your life. End of story.

I'm lucky. No, they're lucky. They have two copies of Kong on the shelves.

Mind you, two of only about 12 copies, again.

What the hell? I've heard good things about Kong - good adventure, long run-time but full of action. And hey, who doesn't like Jack Black's crazy ass?

I figured it would be one of those Guaranteed In Stock items. Capote too, since it was a Best Pic nom.

No.

At my Hollywood, it would have likely been the reverse problem. Mad plenty copies of Capote and Kong - probably only a handful of 50. A good thing when I'm looking for some movies. Not such a good thing when I'm looking for others.

Then again, every little burb boy is spitting 50's rhyme when I pass by them in the community. So, who knows. They may stock Get Rich knowing the burb kids' tastes.

Well, time is flying.

I stare at the two Kong's left and wonder for a second. At my Hollywood, the DVD cases lie in front of the Display Case. When the movies are all gone, all that's left is a case that says "Display Only."

So I see about ten of those and then these two clunky, ginormous plastic covers with the DVD in them.

Are these the previously viewed DVDs that they sell? Are they VHS versions?

I can't tell. The case is huge.

I look around, notice a woman who has about a dozen DVDs in her hand. They're all slipping away from her because the case is so bulky and hard to manage.

I'm guessing she's not purchasing all of those. So this must be how they package their rentals.

I snatch Kong up and head for the counter.

Sure enough, the hugantic cases are "safety" features to prevent anyone from stealing them.

Un-huh.

Look, there's nothing wrong with preventing theft. But ah...the Hollywood around my way has these safety clips that have to be taken off like a security tag put on clothing. You barely notice it, unless you try to open the case while browsing.

Rant: I'm glad Hollywood Video has decided to place a location in an area that's predominately black. They along with the Safeway, Quiznos, Ledos and CVS are providing jobs and convenience to the residents nearby.

There are nearly a dozen communities within walking distance of the plaza. Some of the neighborhoods are all black, several new communities are predominately white. A couple (few) are mixed.

But look, if you're going to trust the area enough to open a business there - operate it like you operate all the other ones.

Open on time. Have the latest technology at your stores and don't make customers feel like they're in some kind of minimum security lock-down by chaining the product to the shelves.

We are not talking inner city metro area. We're talking L.A. - Little Annapolis, population 36,000, Maryland's capital and home to the U.S. Naval Academy.

I live all of twelve minutes outside of Annapolis. But my experience today was world's apart from visits to my local video store.

Is the vibe in the store different or is it me?

Are the polices different because the franchise owner chose to operate the store differently? If so, that's odd. Most franchises have to follow policies and procedures to the letter.

Am I boogee to expect that a franchise run nearly identical from one location to another - especially when we're talking only minutes apart?

Am I trifling for having certain "high" expectations or are they because they don't meet them?